Destination I Do
Friday, October 29, 2010

A Recipe to Quit Your Body Achin' and Get That Booty Shakin'

Words by Courtney Kellar
Words by Caroyln, the Antibride
Photo courtesy of

I knew it was coming: working around the clock towards a looming ship date, taking BART downtown amidst a plague-train full of working class heroes hacking away and that telltale tickle at the back of my throat. Uh-oh! There’s nothing like San Francisco weather to confuse the body: 80 degrees on a Tuesday and Dolores Park is full of scantily clad sun worshipers soaking up daylight before plunging into perpetual darkness (we get maybe 10 days of sunshine a year). The following day, the temperature drops 40 degrees, the fog rolls in and everyone gets immediately sick.

Halloween in SF is akin to St. Patrick’s Day in Dublin, or Carnevale in Brazil. It’s a bit of a production (and on the heels of Burning Man no less): costumes at work, drinking at lunch, a bit of a bacchanal. And how about them Giants? World Series contenders! SF is on fire with hope and possibilities. SF is ready to party like it’s 2099. But the problem is, everyone’s fever and throat is on fire too: its flu season. And it being Friday, that gives everyone exactly 1 day to get well by Saturday night. But you can heal up and have fun concurrently, so pay attention….

Here’s a little kitchen sink recipe that I swear by, but you have to just trust in the process and follow orders. The goal: to be able to wear your sexy [insert] witch, nurse, police, fireman costume this Halloween, sneeze free. On that note, it’s my pleasure to share this vitamin C whiskey bomb that will scare the germs right out of you. BOO!

Emergen-C Whiskey Elixir
1. Run a tub, as hot as you can possibly stand.

2. Put on whatever music makes you very, very, very sleepy.

3. Turn off your Blackberry, mobile devices, laptop, TV and wall phone (that goes for all you SF app developers!).

4. Boil water and squeeze 2 or 3 ripe lemons into a coffee cup.

5. Put in 1-2 Emergen-C lite 1000 mg. Vitamin C and Glucosomine packets of powder.

6. Put a teaspoon of Marshall’s raw, unfiltered honey (or any honey you have, honey).

7. Put in two gigantic slices of raw ginger.

8. Pour boiling water over it all and stir. Fill 3/4 of the cup with boiling water.

9. Check the tub.

10. Grab a bottle of any brown liquor you have, (I like Jameson, but Dewars, Makers Mark or any scotch, or bourbon whiskey will do the trick) and pour a healthy shot into the mug.

Note: a quotable quote from one of my uncles, regarding medicinal tea: “Kid, beer dehydrates you, but whiskey kills things!”

11. Check the volume of the John Coltrane CD you put on.

12. Sink into the tub, put your nose and mouth over the steaming cup and breathe in, then take a sip. Yum! Finish the entire mug, and enjoy a heady mix of citrus, ginger, and peat infused Irish whiskey.

13. Slather Vicks Vapo-rub all over your chest, put on your flannels, get into bed, pile on the blankets, wake up the next day and BOO! You are almost ready for that Lady Gaga get up and a very late night.

Happy Halloween!

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