While planning your wedding, you want to be sure all of your boxes are checked. But, one box often gets overlooked. You’ve chosen the date, the destination, and the vendors…now it’s time to focus on your First Dance! Our lead dance experts Cori Presutti-Ochosa of First Dance at Home and Tonisha Agard at The Dancing Designer share their tips on how you can achieve the First Dance of your dreams.

Getting Started

Q: We’ve decided to do a First Dance at our wedding…what’s next? 

First Dance at Home: Learning to dance for your wedding- no matter how you learn- is often the most fun part of wedding planning because it is a time during the week for a couple to just have fun learning something new, connecting, and working as a team to create something that is special to them.  For many couples, even just learning some simple basics to elevate the dance beyond a ‘high school sway’ and feel more prepared helps them feel less anxious about their wedding dance.  If you have the budget to learn in person, then I recommend finding someone who is highly rated and who you vibe with. 

Time Investment

Q: How much time should I invest in learning a First Dance?

The Dancing Designer: I recommend couples start preparing their first dance 3 to 6 months before the wedding to feel confident and enjoy the process. This time frame gives you space to learn the choreography, make adjustments, and avoid any last-minute stress. If your dance includes lifts, intricate transitions, or multiple styles, beginning closer to 6 months is ideal. However, for simpler, elegant routines, 2 to 3 months can work beautifully.

Choosing the Song

Q: What should we keep in mind when choosing a song for our First Dance?

The Dancing Designer: Choose a song that you two as a couple connect with but would also be enjoyable and entertaining to your guests. Consider songs that have a great melody and invigorating sentiments about love. If you are dancing to one song ensure it’s also timeless. There are also wedding dances that aren’t exclusive to the couple – father/daughter, groomsmen, wedding party – it’s fun to get creative and surprise your guests with some added entertainment. 

First Dance at Home: Whichever song you choose, I let couples know that the sweet spot for a First Dance is 2-2.5 minutes if you’re a) looking to hold your guests’ attention span, b) avoid anything that feels like it starts dragging and c) have enough time to comfortably learn that length of dance. Most songs are longer than that. I coach my couples on finding spots in the music that will feel like a natural spot for an ending and using an ending step like a dip accompanied by communicating with their DJ to fade out to get your guests clapping and signal the end of the dance.

The Learning Process

Q: What experiences might we have while learning a First Dance in person or online?

The Dancing Designer: When you start your First Dance rehearsals remember you already have a connection and you can rely on it as a foundation through this process. As you start to learn movement, choreography, turns, dips, etc. in the studio, you will get to know and trust your partner on a whole different level. Your bodies will learn to flow together and the connection will bring you to a new level of intimacy.

First Dance At Home: Learning online is amazing if you’re looking to learn a simple but elevated first dance. It gives couples maximum flexibility with their schedule as well- especially if couples work jobs that are opposite shifts. It lets couples also learn at their own pace and in a space they’re comfortable in.

Q: How do I practice my First Dance if I have a destination wedding?

The Dancing Designer: Try to get as much information from your wedding planner as possible about the space. Pictures from the venue are always helpful. Understand how large of a space you will have to dance and if there will be any obstacles. During rehearsals, do your best to mimic the venue and stay within spatial constraints to make the space feel less foreign when you arrive.

Parting Advice

Q: Any final thoughts on incorporating dance into our Big Day?

First Dance at Home: A First Dance should be as unique as a couple’s bond. Music and dancing are such a reflection of this.  So, whether you’re a couple that wants all the wow factor and are hoping to learn a showstopping first dance or you just want a low-key, relaxed, intimate dance where you feel good dancing, really discuss together what you envision and then give yourselves time to learn it.  The process is much less stressful the more time that is allowed but with good instruction, it will be the most fun part of the wedding planning process! 

The Dancing Designer: Patience is important when learning anything new, especially when learning choreography, musicality, performance skills, etc. It helps when couples remember how different they each learn and how to support each other through that process. Frustration may occur but giving your partner grace, in turn, will allow you grace as you are both on this journey together.

Cori Presutti-Ochosa, Owner and Instructor at First Dance at Home fell in love with dance while studying Argentine Tango in Buenos Aires. From there she quickly advanced in the world of ballroom and dancing and began choreographing, performing and coaching. After a successful stint at opening the leading boutique wedding dance studio in San Diego, her efforts led her to developing First Dance At Home to continue to help couples find joy through dance. First Dance At Home is available here.

Tonisha Agard, Owner and Lead Choreographer at The Dancing Designer is a highly skilled performer and instructor in Hip Hop, Latin dance, having worked in music videos, award shows and much more. Founding TDD in 2018, it was her goal to offer personalized instruction, group classes and team building experiences through the fundamentals of body movement and dance. Teaching people how to connect with each other through dance and cultivating personalized dances for happy couples has been her passion. TDD is available in New York City, New Jersey and Long Island.

First Dance Photography by Photos by Salome